Pants-free, fat, drunk and talking back to the TV? You could have a problem!

Pants-free, fat, drunk and talking back to the TV? You could have a problem!

Pants-free, fat, drunk and talking back to the TV? You could have a problem!

Updated: 16 Apr 2020
David Hogan

Going Pantless

There’s something especially freeing about going pantless for the day, but when it becomes your new-norm, it can lead to issues. Risks include going shopping, collecting the paper, answering the door and of course, standing up while zooming pants-free.

Drinking alone

Solo drinking is typically driven by being bored and exacerbated by being alone, which is why the ‘don’t drink alone’ rule works. The obvious work-around is drinking while face-timing with friends. A plant, pet and photos of people do not qualify as friends!

Eating nonsense

If your routine is bored = eating then remember the following: if you don’t have any snacks in the house, you can’t eat them; if your snacks are 50% fat, you can eat twice as much with the same result; even if your snacks are low-cal, eating 1kg per day is still going to make you fat.

Finding friends on TV

When you find yourself talking back to the TV and talking to others about your ‘friends’ on Netflix, you have an issue. It’s time to move away from the remote and call a friend, any friend…

Self-isolating

If you find yourself pants-free, fat, a little big drunk and taking to the TV, then it’s time to get out and about. Call or zoom a friend or even better, find someone to go for a walk. I recommend someone who is also a little fat and drunk that you can have a giggle with. Your skinny, sober mate who is coping just fine will have you back drinking and gorging with your ‘TV friends’ in no time!
Pants-free, fat, drunk and talking back to the TV? You could have a problem! - Localista